Film Reviews

Send Help // Blue Heron

Link to the full article: https://www.excal.on.ca/arts/2026/03/21/the-kernel-freshly-popped-film-reviews-batch-5/

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Send Help, dir. Sam Raimi
Sam Raimi returns to the big screen to direct his first R-rated film in over 20 years with Send Help, a gonzo survival-action-comedy starring Rachel McAdams and Dylan O’Brien. After a work trip goes awry and their plane crashes near a deserted island, hardworking Linda (McAdams) and entitled boss Bradley (O’Brien) are the only survivors and must endure their brutal environment. Bradley is surprised to discover that Linda, despite her frumpiness and seeming ineptitude, is extremely equipped to handle island life, and thus quickly becomes his superior.
Written by Mark Swift and Damien Shannon, Send Help’s screenplay feels like a relic of the 90s or 00s, heavily utilizing visual setups and payoffs and relying on comedic beats, character tropes, and dynamics that defined previous decades. The film seems to have been handcrafted for Raimi’s directorial eye as he indulges in the grossness and grime of the island premise, unafraid to make these attractive actors look and act nastily. The film contains several of Raimi’s trademarked tricks, including a few jump scares, excessive gore, and over-the-top performances.
Being a two-hander and a genre comedy film, both of the lead performances in Send Help were excellent. McAdams and O’Brien knew precisely which tone to hit, amping up their performances in terms of comedy, action, and horror, letting themselves become cartoon characters when needed. McAdams was delightful to watch, and seeing her able to let loose was a breath of fresh air when compared with her dramatic oeuvre. O’Brien’s snarky cackle and smug affect helped to craft a perfect villain, yet one whose moments of kindness and profound weakness still lend him sympathy.
Send Help’s main downsides are its pacing, particularly in its second act, with some sequences dragging the runtime out, and some of the CGI looking less than stellar. Still, the film feels like such a unique experience because it leans into a vision of silliness. While 20 years ago letting a genre director direct a genre film would have been a drop in the bucket, at this point in filmmaking culture, the move feels like an artistic risk. Recommend!

Blue Heron, dir. Sophy Romvari
Having gone into this screening with little knowledge of director Sophy Romvari’s previous work, this was the TIFF film that surprised me the most. Blue Heron, told through the perspective of youngest daughter, Sasha (Eylul Guven), follows a Hungarian-Canadian family who are struggling to cope with the increasing behavioural issues of eldest son, Jeremy (Edik Beddoes). Romvari employs a sudden shift halfway through the film to recontextualize the story thus far, and focus on the process of recontextualization itself, asking whether art can help someone come to terms with their own history.
Blue Heron is a striking debut that indicates a talent far greater than Romvari’s age and experience might suggest; she deftly handles themes of family, detachment, and self-reflection, utilizing a temporally layered story and a unique style that feels akin to a home movie. The filmmaking endears the audience to the family, as we are given intimate access to their inner lives and can witness their struggles to understand and protect one another, despite the clear love they share.
The performances are as strong as the writing and direction, with everyone across the board delivering thoughtful and careful work. Guven’s soft sincerity played against Beddoes’ inscrutable countenance is as tender as it is unnerving. Ádám Tompa and Iringó Réti as the parents of this household provide authenticity in the ways they struggle and exhaust themselves over and over again for the sake of their family.
The emotional gut-punch of Blue Heron’s latter half comes slowly and then all at once. The viewer questions the sudden change in protagonist, setting, and, seemingly, time, until it all begins to make sense once again. I heard more than my fair share of sniffles from the audience — myself included — once the third act set in, when many lingering questions were answered and the characters were able to reach points of catharsis previously unseen in other works on familial trauma. I found this to be an overwhelmingly excellent debut feature that reflects incredibly well on Romvari’s future directorial output and on Canadian filmmaking as a whole. Highly recommend!

Arco // Merrily We Roll Along

Link to the full article: https://www.excal.on.ca/arts/2026/02/13/the-kernel-freshly-popped-film-reviews-batch-4/

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Arco, dir. Ugo Bienvenu (Note: watched with English dub)
Arco is a French animated film directed by Ugo Bienvenu that follows Iris (Romy Fay), a young girl living in the year 2075, who witnesses the crash-landing of Arco (Juliano Krue Valdi), a brash yet sweet time-travelling boy from 2932, and must help him find his way back home. The two discover their own wants and desires in the process of their adventure, and learn to take responsibility for their actions and the impact they have on others.
While Arco’s story is rather simplistic — it is, after all, made with young audiences in mind — it makes up for this relative flatness through its rich and distinctive world-building, and does an exceptional job of situating the audience within its unique setting. One of Arco’s greatest strengths as a film is its incredibly detailed and lush art style; it is clearly inspired by the work of Mœbius, Hergé, and anime companies like Studio Ghibli or Production I.G., which all utilize fairly simple character designs that have a tangible human weight to them, set against beautifully complex backgrounds.
Also reminiscent of Studio Ghibli within Arco are the themes of environmentalism and humanity’s role in the commonplace catastrophes that arise from our repeated band-aid solutions to climate change. The environmental messaging of the film managed to feel both incredibly important to its narrative and yet not overly self-aggrandizing or preachy, which is always a difficult tone to reach when tackling these issues in kids’ media.
While I wish I were able to see this film with its original French audio, the English actors provided excellent voice performances with the pathos and humour required to sell this adventure in full. Its scattered moments of slapstick felt earned alongside the relative gravitas of the overall story, and worked to endear the audience to the characters. In the end, Arco is extremely charming and visually beautiful, though not overly memorable. Recommend!

Merrily We Roll Along, dir. Maria Friedman
In this restaging of Stephen Sondheim’s famed musical of the same name, Merrily We Roll Along follows the lives of three best friends, Franklin (Jonathan Groff), Charley (Daniel Radcliffe), and Mary (Lindsay Mendez), whose story is told to the audience over the course of three decades, beginning with a tumultuous falling out at the end of their careers and moving backwards through time to when the trio first meet.
Each of the three leads in this production were nominated for a Tony Award, with Groff and Radcliffe winning Best Lead and Featured Actor in a Musical, respectively, so it feels rightfully easy to praise the performances in this film. Their fiery chemistry sells the idea that they are lifelong friends, making their inevitable dissolution all the more heartbreaking. Radcliffe in particular was a delightful surprise, with his solo number, “Franklin Shepard, Inc.,” being the undoubted showstopper of the production.
Maria Friedman’s directorial choices, both in the staging of the musical itself and in the filmmaking on display, showcase the nuances of Sondheim’s original piece. In a live performance of the Broadway show, an audience member is unlikely to see the characters’ minute expressions from up in the balcony, but Friedman employed frequent close-ups to let viewers better glimpse the barely subdued emotions bubbling beneath the actors’ skins. At times, the choice to tightly frame so much of the film obscured the excellent staging and set design, but Friedman’s decision was extremely effective in conveying emotional turning points.
My main gripe with this film comes from the original text, which sees Mary as being hopelessly in love with Frank, despite his only ever seeing her as a friend. While this is a fine character motivation, the script leaves her with little else to do than pine over someone who does not love her back. Almost all of the charm Mary holds stems from Mendez’s incredible stage presence, which is marvellous, though I wish she had more to work with. Generally, this was a very strong adaptation of an under-appreciated musical, brought to film with an exacting eye. Recommend!

If I Had Legs I'd Kick You // Wake Up Dead Man: A Knives Out Mystery

Link to the full article: https://www.excal.on.ca/arts/2025/12/13/the-kernel-freshly-popped-film-reviews-batch-3/

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If I Had Legs I’d Kick You is the second feature from writer, director, producer, and actress, Mary Bronstein, who dons each of these hats in this invigorating film. The film follows Linda (Rose Byrne), a mother who is pushed to her physical and mental limit when she must deal simultaneously with her daughter’s mysterious illness, her ever-absent husband, her therapy practice and its complicated patients, her destroyed home, a prolonged motel stay, and a total lack of sleep.
Rose Byrne’s leading performance is incredibly engaging throughout the entire film; she maintains a manic and desperate energy that lets the viewer feel the weight of the world on her shoulders. Stylistically, comparisons have already been drawn between this film’s tone and Benny and Josh Safdie’s Uncut Gems, which harnessed a similarly malevolent and relentless energy that never gives the audience nor characters a moment’s rest. What frees If I Had Legs I’d Kick You from this comparison is how the film points its proverbial finger at the complexity of motherhood in the modern world.
Alongside Marielle Heller’s Nightbitch and Lynne Ramsey’s new release, Die My Love, If I Had Legs I’d Kick You explores the inherent horror of being a mother, losing one’s sense of self behind the label, and exploring a longing to free oneself from the shackles of the unreasonable expectations put on parents — especially women — and one’s own biology and body.
The film, despite being emotionally heavy and thematically rich, is also incredibly funny, utilizing its comedy to shatter the otherwise nerve-shredding tension being built. The casting of comedians like Conan O’Brien and the suddenly-everywhere Ivy Wolk lends the film an off-kilter comedic sensibility that runs both parallel to and convergent with the drama at hand.
The sound design is another notable aspect of this film’s ability to convey its goals, with an almost ever-present soundscape and score that surrounds and swallows the protagonist. It both overwhelms and envelops the audience within the film’s crushing ambience, yet leaves us smiling as it comes to a crescendo. Highly recommend!

Wake Up Dead Man: A Knives Out Mystery, dir. Rian Johnson
Wake Up Dead Man, the third chapter of the Knives Out series, saw its release this year at TIFF, continuing a tradition established by director Rian Johnson with the previous installment, Glass Onion, in 2022. Wake Up Dead Man turns its gaze towards faith, following Jud (Josh O’Connor), a former boxer turned priest who seeks to make a difference in his community, brushing up against the establishment and his congregation leader, Monsignor Wicks (Josh Brolin), who incites cruelty and zealotry among his followers. When an impossible death occurs, followed by several seemingly supernatural scenarios, detective Benoit Blanc (Daniel Craig) is called in to investigate and situate the truth within this superstitious system.
Like the previous Knives Out installments, Johnson continues to surprise audiences with the twists and turns of his mystery scripts, spurring numerous gasps and speculative whispering from the viewers at my screening.
Performance-wise, the film belongs to Josh O’Connor as Daniel Craig takes a back seat to the younger star; yet, O’Connor’s moment in the spotlight also comes at the detriment of the rest of the cast. The Knives Out films typically relish their star-studded casts, assembling ensembles that play off of one another in the name of intrigue and comedy equally. However, in Wake Up Dead Man, I often forgot some characters even existed. The narrative focus on Jud and his struggle with his faith was compelling, but it frequently left the other characters too far in the periphery.
Wake Up Dead Man is much darker than the previous two Knives Out entries, both in subject matter and in visual style. The film draws much of its aesthetic inspiration from Gothic and religious iconography, sometimes even dipping its toes into horror. This direction is taken with such finesse that I can only hope that Johnson considers making a true horror film sometime soon, as he clearly has the muscle for it. The mystery is satisfying once the reveal arises, and I greatly encourage anyone interested in the film to see it in theatres during its limited release period, even though it is now available on Netflix. Recommend!

Frankenstein // Sentimental Value

Link to the full article: https://www.excal.on.ca/creative/2025/11/07/the-kernel-freshly-popped-film-reviews-batch-2/

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Frankenstein, dir. Guillermo Del Toro
Guillermo Del Toro returned to TIFF, fresh from receiving his key to the city, with his take on Mary Shelley’s classic novel Frankenstein, starring Jacob Elordi, Oscar Isaac, Christoph Waltz, and Mia Goth. In the decades-long journey to adapt this story of which Del Toro is so fond, he has created a veritable pantheon of iconic movie monsters in his wake, leaving many excited to see his attempt at depicting perhaps the most iconic movie monster in history.
While I cannot speak to Frankenstein’s book-accuracy, the film crafts a very lush and rich story, filled with atmospheric Gothic sets, ornate costumes, and exquisite monstrosity in its makeup, puppets, and visual effects. Despite the film’s ultimate trajectory as a Netflix Original landing it a place in the streaming platform’s catalogue, it begs to be watched in a theatre, due to its visual grandiosity and epic structure. One still notices the “Netflix sheen” from this film, no matter how auteur-driven it is; this quality is characterized by noticeable CGI effects, muddy or dim visuals, and a general flattening effect on the image. While these issues were not present for the entirety of Frankenstein, they would frequently stick out and elicit the feeling of a TV production.
The performances, on the other hand, hold the gravitas that befits a film of this scale. Jacob Elordi, whose turn as the monster is as beautiful and delicate as it is menacing and brutish, was the clear standout. He embodies the pathos of being misunderstood in a way that is often lacking in adaptations of this source material, but is a prevalent theme throughout Del Toro’s other works about monsters. The rest of the cast inhabit their characters with gusto, but Elordi manages to hijack the viewer’s attention whenever he is onscreen. While Frankenstein has the markings of some of Del Toro’s best films, it almost feels like a retread of themes and visuals better explored in his previous works. Still — I recommend!

Sentimental Value, dir. Joachim Trier
When their estranged filmmaker father (Stellan Skarsgård) returns home with a movie idea, sisters Nora (Renate Reinsve) and Agnes (Inga Ibsdotter Lilleaas) must reconsider their rocky relationship with him and determine the level of involvement they will take in his new project.
Director Joachim Trier, whose previous film, The Worst Person in the World (2021), received critical acclaim and two Academy Award nominations, returns with, in my opinion, an even more refined piece. Trier utilizes a clean shooting style with mostly handheld but hardly ever shaky shots, which lends Sentimental Value a feeling of controlled chaos that complements the film’s screenplay and performances. The relationship between Nora and her father, Gustav, is incredibly moving and sits firmly at the core of the film, bolstered by two award-worthy performances.
Reinsve in particular delivers something electric in this role, tapping into a universal sense of anxiety and abandonment, while keeping Nora’s character firmly individual and personable despite her flaws. Each element of this film comes together rewardingly, with strong themes of rootedness, family, and self-actualization, alongside visual motifs of artifice set against stark realism.
In contrast, Elle Fanning’s inclusion in the film as American actress Rachel Kemp, who is given the lead role in Gustav’s movie, feels somewhat out of place from a performance perspective. Narratively, Rachel serves as a connection point between Scandinavia and the rest of the world, with the power of her name providing legitimacy to this otherwise very personal and very proudly Norwegian production. Performance-wise, however, Fanning never seems to fit well into this very naturalistic world. Her persona — always the bubbly and determined ingénue — feels more put-on than ever when compared to her peers.
Perhaps Trier could argue that Fanning’s performance is meant to highlight the aforementioned dichotomy of embellishment and reality, but I felt that she detracted overall from an otherwise very well-constructed film. Despite this minor misgiving, the film is highly recommended!

Nirvanna the Band the Show the Movie // TIFF Short Cuts

Link to the full article: https://www.excal.on.ca/arts/2025/10/19/immediate-mubi-must-sees/

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Nirvanna the Band the Show the Movie — dir. Matt Johnson
As a longtime fan of Nirvanna the Band the Show (2007-2018), I come into this review with rose-tinted glasses, but the film truly lives up to all the lofty expectations it had set for itself as a spiritual successor to the show.
Nirvanna the Band the Show the Movie follows Matt (Johnson) and Jay (McCarrol), two best friends and the only members of a band called Nirvanna the Band, who would do just about anything to book a show at the Rivoli, a bar on Queen Street in Toronto. When they accidentally discover the secret to time travel after another failed scheme to play at the Rivoli, the boys end up in 2008 and create a ripple effect that has a lasting impact on the band’s future.
Directed by and starring Matt Johnson in his latest outing since 2023’s Blackberry, one can see the compounding nature of his DIY, scrappy filmmaking style in full bloom. Aided by longtime collaborator, cinematographer Jared Raab, Johnson has nailed down his street-style fast-and-loose approach to shooting, which involves collecting hours of footage to find something to piece together in a logical and, most importantly, funny way.
And it was funny. The film premiered at a rowdy Midnight Madness screening full of Torontonians (including Mayor Olivia Chow) excited to see themselves represented onscreen. Many of the film’s sequences left the crowd in hysterics, as they wondered aloud how this crew managed to capture half of the antics it depicts, which is always part of the fun with this franchise.
While it is still accessible to an audience who has never seen the series prior, it becomes all the more satisfying to the pre-existing fanbase, as the film fully recaptures the magic that made the show so special. More than anything, the film embodies the spirit of friendship in both a tongue-in-cheek and incredibly sincere manner through the relationship between Matt and Jay.
Highly recommend!

Short Cuts programme 1
The first programme of TIFF’s Short Cuts was one of my favourite collections that I saw this year, featuring standouts like Agapito (dir. Arvin Bearmino, Kyla Danelle Romero), Ramón Who Speaks to Ghosts (dir. Shervin Kermani), The Girl Who Cried Pearls (dir. Chris Lavis, Maciek Szczerbowski), and DISC (Blake Rice).
Agapito follows a group of workers at a bowling alley in the Philippines who close their business early to accommodate a visit from the manager’s disabled brother. The film takes a sudden experimental turn, utilizing dance and vocals to depict its themes, resulting in something unique and beautiful.
Ramón Who Speaks to Ghosts made me laugh and moved me to tears with its depiction of a lonely man who wanders the recently volcanic-scorched earth with a microphone, claiming to hear the ghosts of those who previously inhabited these spaces. The film, shot in documentary style, explores trauma and memory in a quirky way without feeling twee or sappy, and lets the viewer get close to Ramón through its filmic approach.
The Girl Who Cried Pearls is a stop-motion animated short with lush and vivid visuals — exquisite attention was paid to set/production design and the incredibly fluid animation. The fantastical story of a poor boy exchanging a girl’s tears for money loses steam by the end, but one can’t help but be enraptured by the experience throughout.
Finally, DISC is a darkly comedic film that follows a man and a woman post-hookup, when the woman realizes her menstrual disc has been lodged inside her body and she needs help extracting it. The performances enhance this short, with both actors delivering excellent physical comedy and facial acting skills, paired with a disruptive intensity from the filmmaking itself. Other shorts featured in this program are Jazz Infernal (dir. Will Niava), Healer (dir. Chelsea McMullen), and A Small Fiction of My Mother in Beijing (dir. Dorothea Sing Zhang). Recommend seeking out all of these films!

Creative Writing

TIFF on the Thrift

Link to the full article: https://www.excal.on.ca/arts/2025/10/15/tiff-on-the-thrift/

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The Toronto International Film Festival (TIFF) celebrated its 50th anniversary this year, and I was able to see just around 50 screenings by the end of my experience.
TIFF was widely celebrated throughout the city, as both King Street and Richmond Street bustled with guests running to theatres, rushers forming insanely long lines, and passersby exploring the accompanying street festival stands. This year also saw the inclusion of the Criterion van, where patrons could replicate the closet videos of their favourite celebrities, as well as get a good discount on Criterion DVDs.
TIFF as a whole has become increasingly difficult to manoeuvre in the last few years thanks to a combination of rising ticket prices, scalpers running amok, higher demand for screenings, and fewer accessibility windows for ticket-buyers. Here, I will disseminate information and offer my best advice as a frequent attendee of the festival who wants to enable others to participate as fully as they can.
One of my first rules this year was to avoid the Criterion van if I could help it. Many of the queuers I spoke to had gone to the van and had a great time; clearly there was an eager and happy public for this offering, but I just couldn’t stand in another hours-long line to buy a $30 DVD. The queueing experience is essential to TIFF — whether you are a ticket holder, a rusher, or a booth visitor, standing in line is a rite of passage.
In said lines, one will almost always find friendly filmgoers excited to share about the films they have seen or are looking forward to seeing, their professions, their favourite films, and their Letterboxd accounts. Some of the strongest connections I have made with fellow cinephiles and filmmakers in the city have come from these TIFF lineups, especially the lines for big events that leave patrons waiting for hours. If, however, socializing is not a top priority, you can busy yourself with a book or pop in some headphones.
Similar to years prior, I had certain screenings for which I knew it would be impossible to get tickets, so I would plan my days around the fact that I would have to allot a certain amount of time to rushing. At TIFF, you can get rush tickets for essentially any screening if you line up outside the theatre for a given time, though your success is often dependent on the film’s popularity. Some lines only involve waiting for a few minutes to an hour, while others demand several hours, all to only potentially be let inside.
Taking advantage of the rush system is one of the best ways to save money at TIFF and get access to in-demand screenings. For the past two years, I have purchased an Under-25 Rush Pass, which costs $40 and essentially pays for itself after rushing two screenings (the regular Rush Pass is $80). I think these passes are worth the price if you intend to watch even a handful of films and have the time and ability to wait around.
More than in previous years, it was incredibly difficult to procure tickets to any screenings ahead of time because they would go off sale almost immediately. One would often have better luck purchasing same-day tickets than trying to get any in advance due to the way TIFF ticket releases work. This was my first year with a Press Pass, which gave me access to Press and Industry screenings, free same-day tickets, and worked as a rush pass. Even with these accommodations, I was extremely lucky if I saw any open tickets to in-demand events; yet a complaint that I witnessed across multiple screenings and from several sources was the fact that there were often rows worth of empty seats in theatres that claimed to house sold-out shows.
TIFF weekend screenings see an attendance spike of 9-5ers enjoying a day off, as well as a proportionately lower success rate when rushing or acquiring same-day tickets. Monday sees a significant drop-off as people return to work, the street festival shuts down, and most of the celebrities and filmmakers return home. Most of the films that premiered in the first week will now have readily available reviews, so this is the time to restructure your watchlist accordingly.
In the second week, I prefer to seek out smaller screenings, such as films that piqued my interest but perhaps have not made a big splash. Short film programmes like Short Cuts and Wavelengths are also ideal for discovering rare treasures that may be difficult to find in the future. I tend to avoid films that have their release dates within the next three months, unless there is a unique aspect to the festival screening.
My final word of advice is to give yourself a break. There will come a time when you cannot get into a screening you were passionate about, or you fail at a rush attempt that cost you several hours of standing around outside. In these moments, it’s important to maintain perspective. In most cases, you will likely be able to see your desired film…eventually. Don’t be afraid to switch lines to see something different, or just go home and rest up.
Breaks are sometimes the most important gift you can give to yourself. Even though it might not feel like it at the moment, sitting sedentary and watching too much media at once can burn you out, especially if there is an element of stress involved with getting into the theatre. Breaks are also ideal for those who participate in Midnight Madness screenings. I frequently find that a flu-like feeling starts to arise after about a week at the festival, so taking enough breaks throughout the 10 days helps to ensure that one can see it through to the end.
As enjoyable as a film festival can be, there is a lot of effort and planning that goes into ensuring that you get the most out of your experience without being let down or emptying your bank account. Hopefully, this information can help you in your next festival experience — good luck and happy TIFFty!

This Party is so Crazy (Short Film)

EXT. ROW OF TOWNHOUSES- EARLY EVENING
Two girls (20s) ride up to a house on their bikes. The house looks identical to the houses on the left and right of it. It is dressed up for Halloween with pumpkins and spider webs adorning it. We hear faint thumping music coming from inside.

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JODIE
Is this the place?

STEPH
I think so.

JODIE and STEPH dismount their bikes and lock them up at the fence in front of the house. They are dressed in costumes — JODIE is Spider-Man, STEPH is Dorothy.

STEPH (CONT’D)
This place is so cute!

JODIE
I know, right?

The girls walk up to the door. JODIE knocks on it while STEPH looks at her phone. The door unlocks and opens just a crack as the loud music and chatter spill out. A person dressed as VELMA greets them.

VELMA
(flatly)
Hi, can I help you…?

JODIE
Hey! We’re here for Anne’s party?

VELMA
MmmmmmYeah —

VELMA points at STEPH

VELMA (CONT’D)
You can come in.

STEPH, who was only half paying attention, looks up from her phone, confused. VELMA looks at JODIE.

VELMA (CONT’D)
You just wait outside for like, a minute.

JODIE
Oh?

STEPH
Oh… Okay, well, I’ll see you inside, right?

JODIE
Wait, you’re actually gonna leave me out here?

STEPH
Velma said it would only be a minute, yeah?

VELMA
MmmmmmYeah…

JODIE
Steph… you can’t be serious.

STEPH
I think Dave’s gonna be there…

VELMA
Dave’s literally inside right now.

STEPH
Sorry, Jodie! I’m gonna pop in for A MINUTE — just to, like, make myself known. Then I’ll come back for you — but you’ll probably be inside by then anyway!

VELMA
Mmhmmm…

Before JODIE can protest, VELMA opens the door only slightly wider and STEPH skips inside happily. From outside, the inside looks dark with coloured lights flashing, but JODIE can’t get a good look at it before the door is closed in her face.

JODIE
How will I know when I can come in?

The door locks. There is no response, just the muffled sound of club music and people talking. JODIE bangs on the door again. The door unlocks, opens just a crack, and a girl dressed as an ANGEL opens it.

ANGEL
(flatly)
Hey.

JODIE
Where did Velma go?

ANGEL
Who?

JODIE
The person who was— never mind. Can I come in?

ANGEL gives JODIE a once-over up and down.

ANGEL
MmmmmmNo.

JODIE
(angry)
What, are you at capacity?

ANGEL
Mmhmmm.

ANGEL shuts the door in JODIE’s face and locks it. JODIE knocks and kicks at the door but no one answers. She looks up to the kitchen window and sees someone inside, mid-conversation, also dressed as SPIDER-MAN but their costume is way worse quality than hers. SPIDER-MAN is holding a red solo cup and looks at her from high up, staring. JODIE stares back. SPIDER-MAN leaves the window.

EXT. TOWNHOUSE DOOR - LATE EVENING.
JODIE sits on the steps of the house, waiting for someone to let her in, for her friend to come out, or for someone to put her out of her misery. We see her phone screen: she has sent dozens of messages to Steph with no response. She looks at her bike — she could just leave. She gets up to walk over to her bike, defeated, when a man dressed as a SEXY GHOST walks toward the steps.

JODIE
(chipper affect)
Hey! Cool costume!

SEXY GHOST
Thank youuuuu!

JODIE
Do you mind if I tag along with you inside?

SEXY GHOST
Yeah surrrre!

JODIE
Ugh, amazing! Thank you!

SEXY GHOST
Mmhmmm!

JODIE and the SEXY GHOST walk up to the door and knock on it. The door unlocks and a man dressed as WALTER WHITE opens it just a crack.

WALTER WHITE
(flatly)
What’s up.

JODIE
Can we come in for the party?

SEXY GHOST
Heyyy!

WALTER WHITE looks the two of them up and down. He points at the SEXY GHOST.

WALTER WHITE
You can come in.

SEXY GHOST
Yayyy!

The door opens up a little more and SEXY GHOST enters the house. WALTER WHITE tightens the door gap again and looks at JODIE.

WALTER WHITE
You can wait for like… just a minute.

WALTER WHITE slowly closes the door while staring at JODIE.
JODIE screams at the top of her lungs. The door opens again.

WALTER WHITE
Could you, like, keep it down?

JODIE looks at him incredulously.

WALTER WHITE (CONT’D)
Thanks.

The door shuts again, quickly this time, and locks. JODIE is left alone once more — the sound of the party leaking through the windows.
JODIE sits back down on the steps and pulls out her phone. Still no response from STEPH. She tries calling her. The phone rings on and on, while JODIE eyes her bicycle. Finally, the ringing stops.

STEPH V.O.
(yelling over the noise)
HEY WHERE ARE YOU?

JODIE
I’m still outside, asshole!

STEPH V.O.
(yelling over the noise)
OH MY GOD, WHAT? DUDE, I THOUGHT YOU WOULD HAVE COME IN BY NOW!

JODIE
You know, I would’ve thought that, too! Can you come to the door and let me in?

STEPH V.O.
(yelling over the noise)
YEAH, HOLD ON! (giggling) Dave stop!—

Their call is cut short — STEPH has been distracted again. JODIE sits on the stairs bouncing her knee impatiently. The camera starts wide and slowly zooms in on JODIE as the noise from the party dims quieter and quieter until all we hear is her heavy breathing and the score. By the end of the shot, the camera has reached her face.
Beat.
The sound comes back as the door unlocks — a familiar noise. It creaks open only just a bit as STEPH’s face peeks through. JODIE rushes to her feet to meet her friend.

JODIE
Oh my god, you have no idea how good it is to see your face!

STEPH
So sorry, girl! I didn’t mean to leave you stranded! On the plus side, Dave is here and we’ve been flirting so much… I think he likes me!

JODIE
That’s so awesome, Steph!

JODIE signals to STEPH with her eyes that she would like to come in now. STEPH is not taking the hint

STEPH
Yeah, I know! It’s pretty sweet… Plus Dave has a few cute friends that he can hook you up with — WINK WINK!

JODIE
(hinting heavily)
Oh, great! Maybe we can talk more about it inside! And I can get a drink!

STEPH
Oh. Yeah. (Beat) Hold on, I just need to check really quick—

STEPH ducks her head behind the door for a moment, seemingly conferring with someone, as JODIE watches with wide eyes. STEPH returns to the crack in the door.

STEPH (CONT’D)
You’re gonna hate me, but could you wait just like one teensy little minute?

JODIE
(calmly)
Yeah. That’s no problem.

STEPH
MmmmmmThanks so much!

With that, STEPH shuts and locks the door as JODIE turns to face the street. She is smiling.

EXT. TOWNHOUSE DOOR - NIGHT
The door’s lock clicks and it creaks open only just a crack, where STEPH pops her head out again.

STEPH looks around, concerned. Cut to a wide shot to show JODIE and her bike gone. JODIE’s Spider-Man costume hangs on the fence beside STEPH’s bike, which remains locked up.

STEPH
Jodie?

CUT TO BLACK.

ECON101 (Short Story)

Patrick stood in the rain waiting for the bus one stormy night. While he stood under the stoop of the bus stop, a man and woman approached to take shelter beside him. The three of them stood in silence as they waited for the bus, when suddenly Patrick noticed the man kick the woman in the shin.

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“Ow,” she said quietly, and then the two stood in silence once more. Thinking this was an accident, Patrick minded his business and kept his head down. A few seconds later, however, the man once again kicked the woman in the shin.
“Ow,” she said once more. Patrick looked worriedly at the man, trying to understand what was going on. The man didn’t seem to think he had done anything wrong and continued standing dutifully next to the woman.
Another thump. “Ow!” she said again, louder this time.
“I’m sorry, what is going on over here,” Patrick asked, beginning to get angry. “Are you okay ma’am?”
“Oh, thank you for your concern,” she responded cheerfully. “You’re so sweet.”
“So you’re just okay with this?” asked Patrick.
“Oh no, I’m not,” the woman replied, smiling. “I don’t like it at all.”
Patrick hesitated, unsure of what to say, then exasperatedly turned away from the couple, confused but resigned. Until he heard it once more.
“Ouch!” the woman exclaimed. Patrick turned sharply and approached the man who had now four times kicked this woman in the shin.
“Why are you kicking her?” he asked furiously.
“I’m not,” the man replied, “I’ve done nothing wrong.”
“I saw you do it,” said Patrick, bewildered, “repeatedly!”
“No you haven’t,” the man replied, “you’ve no proof.”
Patrick felt as though he were going insane. The woman seemed to heed no mind to the conversation, she simply stood and waited with a smile. Patrick bitterly returned to his place under the bus stop stoop and took out his phone to text a friend about what he had just experienced. As he typed, out of the corner of his eye he saw the man squat low to the ground and inspect the woman’s shin closely. Patrick quickly switched his phone to camera mode and waited, assuming another injury would occur. Suddenly, the man stood upright and kicked the bruise that had been forming on the woman’s leg, as if to really make her suffer, and she let out the loudest “ouch” of the evening. Patrick snapped a photo just in time.
“Here!” he shouted, “I’ve proof right here!”
The man examined the photo with a scrutinous glance.
“Okay,” said the man, “that’s me. That’s proof.”
“Does that mean you’ll stop now?” Patrick asked. “She is clearly in pain and you are clearly the one causing it.” The man paused, considering Patrick’s words and looking at the tears welling up in the woman’s eyes.
“No, I don’t think I will,” responded the man, finally. “It's too late now, it already happened.” Patrick began seething.
“What do you mean it's too late? She’s standing right here! You could get her an ice pack, or take her to the doctor, or, I don’t know, stop kicking her in the shin!”
“But, if I were to do those things, I wouldn’t get all the benefits that come from kicking her in the shin.”
“What benefits could you possibly reap from this situation?!” Patrick asked, practically screaming.
“Well,” the man began, “me and my buddies all enjoy kicking and we already kicked this lady once, so we figured, let’s keep it going. We’ve got a lot of money tied up in this.” Patrick stood in silence for a moment, absorbing what he had just heard.
“This situation sounds like it's only beneficial for you and your buddies,” he responded.
“Yeah. And?” said the man. Patrick finally resigned himself. The three stood in silence once more as the rain pelted down around them. Once again, Patrick heard a quiet thud and an exclamation of pain. He felt deep down that there was nothing he could do about it.
“Why do you let him do this to you?” Patrick asked the woman. She hesitated, then smiled with tears still in her eyes.
“It’s good for the economy.”

Devolving (Short Story)

There was always something a little bit different about you.

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You often felt the burning, judgemental eyes of your peers on your back as you walked. You would pass those you knew doing things you could only imagine doing yourself - but that was all you could do: imagine. While you were busy thinking about your next meal, how to keep your fur out of your face, or where the best swimming hole was located, your friends were thinking about their next great idea, what the purpose of their fur was anyway, and ways to find new sources of water for the whole community.
You and all of your friends were monkeys. Apes, I suppose, is the proper terminology. But you had noticed that your friends were not as apelike as you thought they should be. You recognized all of your life that you were a little hairier than your peers, a little more hunched, and a little less clear-minded - you had a lot in common with your parents. Your parents said you were just a late bloomer, but you felt something was wrong.
One day, you walked along your trodden path from your home to your favourite spot by the lake, your knuckles dragging on the dirt behind you. It was the way you were taught to walk by your parents - to rely on your hands for support. You heard soft snickering from those behind you, their arms and backs upright as they gawked at your strange saunter. This was a trip you would take at least once every day, finding a little joy in your routine and a little solace from those around you. Once you got down to the water, you sat on your favourite rock and picked up your favourite stick. You would often use your stick to poke and prod at the fish in the lake for fun. On this day, however, your routine was shaken by a disturbing sight.
Out of the corner of your eye, at the other end of the lake’s shoreline, you saw something you’d never seen before. It was a fish, yes, but not any fish you had ever encountered. This one was different. You watched as the fish struggled and shook as it used four long but stumpy fins under its belly to launch itself onto the shore of the lake. It heaved and pushed against its weight as you watched in amazement, unsure of what to do. Finally, after a minute or so, it had fully emerged from the water, crawling with its stumpy appendages toward you.
You panicked.
You shrieked and hollered in terror as this creature you didn’t understand lurched at you. You took your stick in one hand, using your other hand to create a shield between the two of you, and began swinging wildly. You happened to miss the fish, who quickly flopped on its side to get out of your way, rolling back into the lake. You ran back to civilization, excited but frightened by what you had just seen and intent on letting others know.
In the courtyard, you came across your peers practicing their tool usage as you approached quietly. You told your friends about your encounter and asked if any of them had ever seen anything like this before.
“Oh, I have,” one boy responded snidely. “Is this really your first time seeing the walking fish? I thought it was so interesting when I saw one a few months ago.” You blushed after hearing this response - again you were behind everyone else.
“I saw one too!” chirped a girl. “I didn’t know what it was going to do but I took some notes and I watched it move to another pond! They seem to be developing a new form of travel!” One by one, your peers chimed in with experiences they’d had of strange creatures and patterns of movement and you silently noted that none of them were afraid of what they’d seen like you were. Your peers sought to understand, while your instinct was to run. You had never felt so small.
Once the discussion ended, the children went back to their tools, their games, and their studies, while you sat entirely alone, thinking. You thought and thought about anything and everything. For someone with so much on your mind, you could do so little to prove it. Again you watched others who seemed to be more capable than yourself, more skilled, and more able to show it off. If you were a late bloomer, you wondered when your time to bloom would come. Would it ever come?
Needing some comfort and understanding, you rushed back home to see your parents. You ran into your hut to see your mother mashing bananas in a stone bowl. Not able to think of anything else, you ran into your mother’s arms and began babbling about the creature you’d seen by the lake and the way your peers reacted. Your mother held you close and grunted, communicating to you that she sees things that she doesn’t understand every day - that the world is changing so fast and it can be quite scary. The two of you hardly spoke the same language but you understood each other clearly. You thanked your mother and headed back outside.
Seeing your mother content in her banana mashing, you began to think. How many generations would need to go by until your kin were on par with everyone else? Your friends didn’t look like their parents the way you did. You were scared of the future. Would you recognize your own child? Would they speak a different language like you and your mother? Only time would tell.
As the years passed, you kept your hunch, your walk, your love of bananas, and your difficulty with tools, but it turned out that not many of your peers were thinking as introspectively as you were. That had always been a strength of yours. While your peers were ahead in their critical thinking and researching skills, you always had a mind for emotion. The emotion that you once thought limited you from being analytical was the same emotion that ended up opening so many doors for your self-expression. You were actually quite ahead in that regard; communication was the problem. Your ability to communicate your thoughts deepened with time, even if you were still behind on some other parts of life. Your peers began to listen to you, they respect you. You finally found some sense of belonging.
You saw many of your peers continuing their stories through their children. You remembered being afraid of what the future would hold for your offspring. Again you waited, bided your time, and stuck to what you knew you were good at. Knowing that this was what you really wanted, and once the situation was right, you put your fears aside and welcomed a child into the world.
She was someone you knew. Someone a little less hairy than yourself, with a little better posture, and a very fast learner.
You are so excited for her life to begin.